Back To Work

Well, I went back to work this week. By the end of each day, I was exhausted. Because of my exhaustion I did not stay on top of my scripture study but, each day is a new day and I can try to do better! 

I did study Monday-Wednesday though! I studied virtue and I feel like I'm doing well in that area. I'm sure I could improve, everyone always has room to improve, but compared to divine nature, I'm doing well. 

Josh has been busy applying for a new job... A job that if he gets, will allow me to be at home with the girls in a few years. 

Since I'm back to work now, no more late nights, but it's kind of easy when you're exhausted 24/7. 

Goodnight. 

I am

Have you ever had one of those days where nothing was going right and you just felt like nothing you did would be enough?

Yeah... Well, I think I have felt like that for a month or longer depending on the area of my life. 

Yesterday morning, I had a revelation. I am enough.

I have been so overwhelmed with all my callings in life that I feel as though I was stretched too thin and unable to be good at any of them.

I am a teacher, a mom, a wife, a daughter, a primary presidency member, a friend... And if I took the time, my list could go on. 

Teaching is so important to me. These kids spend 6+ hours with me to get an education, but I think that as part of the village, my job is to help them become amazing people and they are just that. They are amazing people. I am so proud of my kiddos that I see 180 days of the year! 

As a mom, I am told it is the most important calling in life. To be able to raise your child to be the best person that he/she can be. To do that, you need to be there and be involved. I feel as I fail this all the time, but I am so glad that our family has the love and support from our personal families and our ward family.

Being a wife is also important because we need to be a family unit. I know that when the kids are grown and gone, it'll be me and him again. We have to learn to love each other, know each other, grow together, and all the other things in our marriage and relationship that make being together so worthwhile. I love my amazing husband for all he is all that he does, even the irritating parts. And I am sure the feeling is mutual.

I am a daughter. I live about 1.5 hours away from home. I should be out there more. Life is just so busy and with a kid, you can never schedule in sickness so life has become go with the flow so I am thankful for technology to at least talk to my mom! 

Being a part of the Primary Presidency is huge. I feel so overwhelmed all the time. I was called in December as first counselor and I have been rolling on the ball ever since. I do my best most of the time... At least I hope. I feel like I am now past the initial learning stages and I need to dive into it all so much more. It's important too because it's our job to teach and to help the teachers and leaders that we guide so the children are learning about the gospel. 

I feel like I am a crummy friend... I literally have to schedule in time with my friends because if I do not my life listed above takes it first. I'm lucky if I get to hang out with a  friend once a month... And I have so many good friendships over the years that I have made and want to make sure I keep open because God has blessed me with some amazing friends in this life. 

After reading this you may understand why I felt so frazzled and stretched thin. Every job I have in life is important. Every job I have has an influencing role whether it's helping/being with my family, educating the young minds in multiple settings, or just being a decent person and friend. 

I am trying. I'm not perfect, but I am enough. As long as I do not stop trying to better myself, then I am sure I will always be enough. :)

Jan./Feb.

So much, yet so little has happened. 

We were all sick for weeks, literally. I got sick between Christmas and New Year's and I really didn't get better until just after President's Day Weekend. The worst of it was over Martin Luther King Jr. weekend, I actually missed a day school even with the longer weekend. Baby girl was sick not quite as long and as for Josh, his sickness left and came back. So this cold season has just been terrible. It's made it so we can't visit some family which really sucks! 

Anyway, we've all been busy! Baby girl has been saying 2 incomplete sentences when she feels she needs too. "I want..." and I totally forgot the other. Lol. Whoops. 

We planted a garden, go to the park and play when we can, and have been trying to eat healthier. It's not working that well because when pregnant, I can handle only what I can handle. Which is sweet stuff and carbs... Seriously annoying! 

Anyway, Josh and I have been busy with church callings, work, and just balancing life. We both have been working a lot. Josh just found out he will be moving to a different shift which will be really good for everyone!